realthog

It's been a while since I've shared any Secrets of the Universe trouvées, but I've been busy. (I've been busier than ever just this past couple of weeks, working flat out in an attempt to get Bogus Science finished before the publisher forgets ever having contracted it, which is why I've barely been peeking at LJ.)

Here's from Alex Chiu's site, which I'm not going to link to because I judge the products he has on sale -- which do things like make you immortal or, in the case of stuff called Gorgeouspil, make you more gorgeous every single day -- to be quack nostra, and I'm not in the business of promoting quack nostra, right? (Well, not unless I get a percentage . . .)

Away from the Gorgeouspil and the immortality rings, Chiu, who's obviously a genius, finds time to answer the question "What is God?" as well as to present his own evolutionary theory, offered as a replacement for Darwinism. Like his immortality rings, it has magnets in it. Part of it goes (pictures omitted but their content obvious):

Now why can animals walk or crawl? I know that their stomach made them craw around hunting for food. But exactly who taought them how to crawl? The answer is no one. The frequency between the animal and its prey made it craw. Below is a picture with two magnets and a metal bar. The metal bar is located near the bigger magnet. The bigger magnet represents the hunter, the metal bar represents the leg of the hunter, and the smaller magnet is the prey.[*]

Now check this out. The metal bar will fly to the middle of the two magnets.

Again, metal bar represents the big magnet's leg. This is how animals start to crawl. Animals' legs and hands are the most conductive parts of their body. Many experiments were done which proved that hands and feet of animals are the most conductive. The more sensitive a body part is, the more conductive it is. My hands are so sensitive that it allows me to play piano and type at extreamely fast speed.

*At this point, dear reader, I had images of those old military buffers using the cutlery and salt cellar to demonstrate the course of battles long gone by . . .