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realthogBill Harnsberger ("Bill from Portland Maine") has very kindly granted me permission to quote this from his Daily Kos blog "Cheers and Jeers":
An Open Letter to America from the Republican Leadership
Dear America,
There has been much confusion about what our position is on the economic stimulus plan now making its way through Congress. Since President Obama made his case yesterday, we would like to make ours now in the interest of equal time. In a nutshell, our plan is streamlined and simple:
First and foremost: lizard marshmallow hat in the wicker basket goes nefarious.
Second: All couch fur in pothole will be goat cheese on a sliding scale. Pearls are carrots drill bit woodpecker equally.
Third: Monkey farts on the naval base gets pitched to solar backgammon limitations. If there are no arias being sung in Poughkeepsie the maple tree gets ranch dressing. Note: Stinky mop excites the trousers.
In the event of a cordless manhole cover, the Easter Bunny gets towel rack plus nuclear pudding.
Above all, lawn chairs will graze on the mixing bowls in toll baskets.
We hope this helps cut through the clutter to give you a better idea of what we as a party stand for---and have to offer the nation---in this most difficult time.
Sincerely,
Your Republican Party Leadership
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i represent the lawn chair coalition
Date: 2009-02-10 06:53 pm (UTC)So there.
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Date: 2009-02-10 07:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-02-10 07:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-02-10 09:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-02-10 10:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-02-11 12:50 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-02-11 12:53 am (UTC)Also.
Re: i represent the lawn chair coalition
Date: 2009-02-11 12:54 am (UTC)Although this depends on your definition of "there".
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Date: 2009-02-11 12:55 am (UTC)Ain't that the ambivalent truth.
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Date: 2009-02-11 12:56 am (UTC)If McCain had only explained all this while on the campaign trail . . .
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Date: 2009-02-11 12:57 am (UTC)O?
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Date: 2009-02-11 12:59 am (UTC)Hm. I'd've thought, given your proclivities, you'd've been more focused on Note: Stinky mop excites the trousers.
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Date: 2009-02-11 01:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-02-11 01:18 am (UTC)And what a job they did.
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Date: 2009-02-11 01:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-02-11 01:34 am (UTC)A?
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Date: 2009-02-11 01:35 am (UTC)Yes, I'm sure they said most of these things at one stage or another. Only less coherently, if you know what I mean.
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Date: 2009-02-11 01:36 am (UTC)Sexist!
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Date: 2009-02-11 01:53 am (UTC)How's the research coming along?
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Date: 2009-02-11 01:58 am (UTC)Might have, had the economy been in good shape. As Poppy managed to win based on the Pledge of Allegiance, McCain might have been able to base his whole campaign on Obama not wearing a flag pin.
Guess the voters decided we have bigger problems now.
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Date: 2009-02-11 02:20 am (UTC)M . . .
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Date: 2009-02-11 02:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-02-11 02:50 am (UTC)I.
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Date: 2009-02-11 02:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-02-11 02:51 am (UTC)"McCain might have been able to base his whole campaign on Obama not wearing a flag pin."
I was worried about that too. Remember Poppy's staunch policy point that he didn't like broccoli?
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Date: 2009-02-11 02:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-02-11 03:50 am (UTC)It was the dumbest Presidential campaign in my living memory -- up to that time.
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Date: 2009-02-11 11:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-02-11 10:40 pm (UTC)*snigger*