realthog: (Default)
realthog ([personal profile] realthog) wrote2008-12-04 09:33 am
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shock festive news unveiled



Those dogged journalists over at NewsBiscuit have the full !!ILLUSTRATED!! story of the Last Supper, but here's a taster:

Lego Bible latest: only nine disciples located

Children being taught Christianity with the use of the Lego Bible have reported that Jesus has now had the symbolic final meal with his nine disciples, although the occasion was slightly marred by several of them having an arm or leg missing.

‘It had actually been eight disciples until this morning, when Thomas was found in the dog basket with big teeth marks on his head.’ said the mother of seven year old Brad Jefferson from Tennessee.
 

[identity profile] ogre-san.livejournal.com 2008-12-04 03:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Nice to hear from you.

Lego Bible? It just boggles.

[identity profile] realthog.livejournal.com 2008-12-04 09:57 pm (UTC)(link)

Then of course there should be the Lego Dictionary, and . . .

[identity profile] sarcobatus.livejournal.com 2008-12-04 05:05 pm (UTC)(link)
Irreverent. But that's News Biscuit.

I noticed they omitted Mary Magdalene in the farcical Lego Bible kit. Actually, when The Last Supper was at last cleaned up and Mary revealed seated beside Christ at the supper table, holding Christ's hand, it set Christians around the world on their ears. I'm certain many of them denounced Da Vinci for including a woman as one of Christ's disciples, suggesting that she was quite possibly his favorite disciple -- for obvious reasons -- especially since the religion deteriorated into a misogynistic cult that denies Christ was a man of flesh, and insists he practiced sexual abstinence.

[identity profile] fledgist.livejournal.com 2008-12-04 08:30 pm (UTC)(link)
Whereas the Gospel of John seems to suggest that Jesus was gay.

[identity profile] realthog.livejournal.com 2008-12-04 11:03 pm (UTC)(link)

In fact, Brad Jefferson's mother (according to the NewsBiscuit report) went on to comment:

‘Yesterday I found Mary Magdalen in the garden and Pontius Pilate turned up in the washing machine, which is sort of appropriate I suppose.’

[identity profile] sarcobatus.livejournal.com 2008-12-05 12:04 am (UTC)(link)
LOL! And where might Judas be?

[identity profile] realthog.livejournal.com 2008-12-05 12:10 am (UTC)(link)

"And where might Judas be?"

The NewsBiscuit report doesn't mention, but it's fairly easy to guess . . .

[identity profile] sarcobatus.livejournal.com 2008-12-05 12:42 am (UTC)(link)
I suppose you need to buy the expanded and more expensive version of the Lego Bible kit, which includes a tree and a complete set of Last Supper action figures.

We're having fun with fiction here, but if you ever browse a Mormon book store you'll find such Biblical games. It's the Kung Fu Grip Joseph Smith action figure, complete with thirty six anatomically correct wives that's the most fun.

(I'm so going to hell . . .)

http://www.thebricktestament.com/genesis/index.html

http://www.vendettachristmas.com/

Merry Christmas, Paul. Don't say I never give you anything.

[identity profile] realthog.livejournal.com 2008-12-05 02:09 am (UTC)(link)

"I'm so going to hell"

Well, Hell is where the heart is, as they say.