Da Easter Bunny Code - Prologue

[realthog]

 

Facts

1 The texts of the Bible were originally written, by hand, in Aramaic. When the editors of the book which today we call the Bible were deciding which texts to allow in the compilation, they decided, as editors have always done, that presentation was all-important. They therefore rejected those texts where the handwriting was so poor they had difficulty reading it. Those suppressed texts are today knows as the Dead Sea Scrawls.

2 If you go to the Vatican Library and ask to see the Dead Sea Scrawls, they look at you funny.

3 Only very, very clever people can read the Dead Sea Scrawls. Fortunately for you, dear reader, I am very, very clever.

4 In 1642 a rogue cleric called the Theologonius Monk founded an ascetic cult which so threatened the existing structures of the Roman Catholic Church that the Pope of the day, Urban VIII, instructed the Knights Templar to carry out the instant extirpation of Monk and all his adherents, and the complete destruction of every last relic of the cult's existence. It is widely believed that nothing of the cult has survived except its name, the Dopus E.B., and that even this should not be mentioned except in conditions of the strictest secrecy in case a Knight Templar jumps out of the wall or something and gets you.

5 That belief is false.

6 Astronomers have for centuries conspired to conceal the fact that the moon really is made of green cheese.

The blurb for this dubious masterpiece was posted earlier, at http://realthog.livejournal.com/6036.html.