Under the Knife

[realthog]

 
On Tuesday I'm to have an angiogram/cardiac catheterization. As far as I can gather -- me, the ever-courageous male an' all -- this involves ripping apart my groin with a chain saw and then jackhammering a probe about the size of a rolling pin up through my circulatory system, shredding soft tissue as it goes, until it can take a photograph of my heart. Pam says it's a tad less traumatic than this, but then it's not her groin. All this so my cardiologist has something he can post on Facebook.

I don't imagine I'll be merrily hopping astride a stolen Harley to get home from the hospital. Indeed, it may well be that I require a year or two of convalescence, not to mention extensive counselling; I plan to take plenty of books with me. Assuming I actually make it home on Tuesday -- as all these Other, Totally Unsympathetic People say I should -- well, I expect major-league tributes to my general all-fired heroism and traditional British pluck.

(Hm. The last time I had my groin ripped apart must have been the early '70s or so. But apparently my insurance company refuses to cover cold ravioli and live marmosets.)

(What I'm really, really hoping to be able to do is get to the book party whose details you can find at http://al-zorra.livejournal.com/305706.html.)

 

Comments

[quilterbear.livejournal.com]

My firend, I will be thinking of you throughout Tuesday, and yes, Wednesday too. I am very much like you in that I despise medical procedures. Thus, you can understand my tortured life since I have had many surgeries and many, many procedures! I can understand your anxiety, but you will be ever so grateful when the anesthesiologist gives you that great drug that will take away alllllll your worries and cares!

You're in my prayers and thoughts. You've got a lot of people here who care about you, and we'll all be waiting for the good report. So don't be idle! post when you can, dang it!

[realthog.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the kind wishes, K!

"you will be ever so grateful when the anesthesiologist gives you that great drug that will take away alllllll your worries and cares"

In fact, they do it under just a local. A main job of mine is going to be to get the medical staff to desist from their enthusiastic suggestions I watch my own innards on a tv screen.

[quilterbear.livejournal.com]

And of course I meant "friend" not "firend"

No, you will have some good stuff when you have the procedure done. I have had several such procedures (though not THAT one) and the stuff they give you to relax you and have you almost "out" is really pleasant. REALLY pleasant.

[realthog.livejournal.com]

"the stuff they give you to relax you and have you almost "out" is really pleasant. REALLY pleasant."

So I have been told, but apparently they don't routinely administer it in this part of the world for this particular procedure, according to my pal Randy (who had an angiogram a few years back) and to the cardiologist: one's kept alert throughout so as all the better to enjoy the TV show. Of course, I may discover otherwise tomorrow.